First Night Out
Well, I went out on the town today, I have to say I am not that impressed with this city. I don't mean to be a spoil sport but it wasn't too exciting. Just the normal grey streets, drunk guys trying to hit on me and high heels, bright lights and cigarette blunts outside every pub and club.
Of course I'm looking for new friends in this city and potentially guys, but really, I don't think from seeing tonight's bunch of guys that I will have any luck. Most of them were just given dutch courage by the alcohol and didn't really have any interest in me besides my looks. I see myself naked every day when I shower, I wish these guys could just get over it and understand the real me, get to know the real me. I don't expect a prince charming or a superman, batman or any other kind of superhero, that's just unrealistic. I just want a guy who understands me like no one else. Tonight it was so far from the case that I am coming back a bit despondent.
Inside the bar it was very loud, far louder than in london, but the people seemed to like it. They seemed to like jumping about drunk with flashing lights in their faces. I could hardly talk to anyone and I got nauseous. It was not a very good start to my stay here. It was not a very good night. Even if I shouted no one could hear me so I started to think, what's the point?
Ok, so I am digressing. But guys are important, you know? Well, not the ones I met tonight, but you know what I mean! Another important thing is friends, but I didn't find any of those either. I haven't started a job yet so I don't have any work buddies. I felt like a right weirdo going out on my own, and strangely enough when guys wanted to talk to me with their lame pickup lines, I couldn't have felt any more alone if I tried. Darn, back to the topic of guys again! No, but seriously , I would love to just have one friend, a group of friends to be with and talk with and give me some support.
I'm going out to the local park in the city centre to just have a look round , and to look at the castles and the shops, not that I can buy anything at the moment. I just don't know what I'm doing, am struggling to find my feet at the moment but my mum says this will pass. I've not been here long at all, don't even have any furniture, no tables or chairs even, so it's way too soon to be jumping to conclusions. Hopefully it will get better soon. I will keep you posted, Amy.